Vertical Movie Theater Proposal

I’m just gonna say it At least not in the way they do right now If we’re gonna keep movie theaters My first suggestion would be to make the screens vertical. some kind of stimulating clip to the top of the screen Let’s also consider splitting up each movie by pressing this

A young man delivers a deadpan rant arguing that movie theaters should be redesigned with vertical screens, stimulating clips, and buttons for skipping short movie segments. The absurd proposal escalates into turning films into hundreds of tiny clips with advertisements between them, parodying short-form video platforms and attention-span culture.

I'm just gonna say it. Movie theaters should not exist anymore. At least not in the way they do right now. Do you really expect someone to sit there for 2 hours and 46 minutes to watch Dune Part 2? If we're gonna keep movie theaters, I think we should fix them up a little bit to allow for the best possible experience. My first suggestion would be to make the screens vertical. It's just easier on the eyes. And then obviously we should add some kind of stimulating clip to the top of the screen to keep people locked in and increase their tension. Let's also consider splitting up each movie into 7 to 800 13 second clips. This way the audience can skip a clip if they're uninterested by pressing this red button. This would also allow us to put in 7-800 ads in between clips. Let me know what you guys think.

• @jemalloc / 1527 2024-03-14