Seagull Chaos on the Train

Once I pimp slapped a seagull into a cafe. I thought it was a ball being thrown at me but it was a flying gull and I instinctively batted it away and into a cafe table full of people. The chaos was unimaginable. Makes me think of this story Yesterday a friend told me what might well be the best story I've ever heard. She had caught the train in from Frankston. And while she was waiting for the train to come, she noticed a man sitting down on the platform with a bag of fish and chips. But he wasn't really eating them. He was just sort of letting them air. This attracted a few seagulls, who began to circle the platform. Instead of shooing the birds away, the man offered them a few chips. He'd toss one a foot or so away from him. It was like he was beckoning them to come closer. He kept doing this, eking the chips out slowly, until there was a big group of seagulls in front of him, 15 or 20. A tiny army. He'd throw them a chip every now and then – just enough to keep the birds interested, but not enough to sate them. It was frustrating. They were getting angry. Squawking. It was like he was rearing them up for... something. Then the train came, and everyone got on. But the man stayed on the ground with his chips. Just when the train was about to leave. It happened. Right before the doors closed, the man threw the entire bag of the fish and chips into the train. The entire flock of seagulls followed the bag. And the doors closed. Inside the train: pandemonium. The next train stop was five minutes away.

A screenshot shows a story about a man at a train platform who slowly lures a growing flock of seagulls with fish and chips. When the train arrives, he throws the entire bag inside just before the doors close, causing pandemonium among the passengers. The joke is the absurdly elaborate setup and chaotic payoff, making it a reaction to an unbelievably funny or mischievous story. EN: A screenshot shows a story about a man at a train platform who slowly lures a growing flock of seagulls with fish and chips. When the train arrives, he throws the entire bag inside just before the doors close, causing pandemonium among the passengers. The joke is the absurdly elaborate setup and chaotic payoff, making it a reaction to an unbelievably funny or mischievous story.

• @rzeczyzabawne / 7057 2023-03-06