POV Date With a News Reporter

POV on a date with a news reporter NOW I'M SO AH, THANK YOU. I BROKEN SEVERAL CONCERN IS THE DRINKS AND CHANGE NO LONGER IN MY PLACE AND

A curly-haired man sits on a park bench and delivers an awkward date monologue in the style of a news report. He discusses dating statistics, a 0% conversion rate, and trying to turn the evening around with drinks, before being rejected and left embarrassed. The joke is useful as a reaction to overly analytical flirting and spectacular romantic failure.

Now I'm so glad we could finally meet. And may I just say that you're even more attractive in person than you are on your profile. Ah, thank you, thank you. Do you come here often? Yes, this is a very common date spot for locals. I've broken several records. Analysts say it's quite absurd. I've been here 15 times in the past six weeks. But the real concern is the conversion rate. It's currently at 0%. But maybe tonight we can have a couple of drinks and change all of that. I don't think so. Okay, well I've been heard that you've been saying that your boyfriend is no longer in the picture and you've been... F***! So why don't we have a couple of drinks, going back to my place and see whether night takes us? Yeah, absolutely not. Fair enough. Tall and curly. Shit news.

• @memstash32 / 1098 2026-02-20