AI Lawyer Commercial Gone Wrong

Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti Follow I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of lawyer commercials and then asked it to write a lawyer commercial of its own. Here is the first page. LAWYER COMMERCIAL INT. FIRM LAW ROOM A LAWYER stands next to a shelf with books. The books are very wide. They have eaten too many words. LAWYER Have you been hurt in an accidental car? Have they government sold your lungs without asking nicely? you meth? Answer me! The lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch. LAWYER (CONT'D) If so, you can act entitled for money. I'll help. I graduated from law school and all my teachers were bitten by dogs. Words scroll across bottom of the screen. These are cases the lawyer takes: UNFAIR STABBING, ILLEGAL SHOES, MUSIC TOO CANADIAN, SUE THE RAIN, DIVORCE YOUR TOILET, FAKE SONS. LAWYER (CONT'D) I have been a lawyer for over 35 weekends and I'm currently dating the Bill of Rights for fun. We see the Bill of Rights. It's in love. The lawyer will break its heart. There is nothing we can do. LAWYER (CONT'D) Let me use it to send your asbestos to court. I will wear two suits and I promise to steal the judge's gavel for you. The lawyer opens the jacket of his first suit. Millions of gavels pour out. His promise was worth. LAWYER (CONT'D) My clients never go to jail town. We see his past clients: a tornado, a tornado, a tornado. LAWYER (CONT'D) Remember, you don't pay any money unless you pay us money. Call for a free use of phone. The phone digits appear. It's your social security number.

A screenshot of a tweet by Keaton Patti presents the first page of a lawyer commercial supposedly written by a bot after watching over 1,000 hours of lawyer advertisements. The script deliberately misunderstands legal advertising, producing absurd phrases such as “unfair stabbing,” “divorce your toilet,” a briefcase full of lemons, and tornado clients. The meme is used as a reaction to impressively nonsensical AI-generated writing or humorously bad imitation of a familiar commercial format.

• @rzeczyzabawne / 3864 2022-12-06