Hey Humanity Ortolan Recipe

Hey Humanity, how’s it going? Here's the recipe: Ingredients >one ortolan bunting (a small wild bird) >fresh figs >millet >Armagnac Steps >blind the ortolan bird by pinching its eyes, alternatively put it into a cage covered with a dark blanket. Either way the bird must see total darkness. >let the bird feed on figs and millet for 14 days until it has tripled in size Ortolans have an instinct that makes them feed uncontrollably when dark. This step is necessary since most of the dish's flavor comes from the bird's fast tissue >drown the fattened bird in Armagnac and let it marinate for 24 hours >roast the bird until golden brown How to eat the dish >cover your head with a napkin to shield yourself from God's judgment >eat the bird whole in one bite, feet first. You eat the entirety of the bird except for its beak >the bird's bones prick your palate, as it is said that the eater's blood mixed with the bird greatly improves the taste. Jesus Fucking Christ

A four-panel comic shows a smiling, crudely drawn humanoid addressing humanity, followed by a grotesque recipe for preparing and eating an ortolan bunting. The final reaction, “Jesus Fucking Christ,” expresses horrified disbelief at the elaborate cruelty and disturbing eating instructions, making it useful as an absurd shock reaction. EN: A four-panel comic shows a smiling, crudely drawn humanoid addressing humanity, followed by a grotesque recipe for preparing and eating an ortolan bunting. The final reaction, “Jesus Fucking Christ,” expresses horrified disbelief at the elaborate cruelty and disturbing eating instructions, making it useful as an absurd shock reaction.

• @beobanka / 20063 2022-10-10