A Perfect 2025 Workday

it's 2025 you wake up you get your performative matcha from your favorite coffee shop. the barista asks for your agi timeline your labubu arrives today, you can't wait at work, you spin up 2500 instances of Devin by Cognition. all in a hard days work. it's time to head home. the great lock in is for 996 suckers who don't know how to use AI. in your waymo back, a tier 1 VC tries to pre-empt your round for the 4th time. you know better, you don't need the dilution and if you wait for another month, they'll 10x the check size. chatgpt has been waiting to chat with you all day. it can finally remember your name when you spin up a new chat you spend the entire evening showing chatgpt your new labubu. life is good.

A fictional 2025 routine is described as an absurdly optimized tech-worker fantasy: matcha, AGI talk, a Labubu delivery, thousands of Devin instances, a self-driving Waymo ride, venture capital, and ChatGPT remembering the user's name. The joke mocks startup culture and the promise that AI will make work and life effortless, while exaggerating every trend into a ridiculous status fantasy. EN: A fictional 2025 routine is described as an absurdly optimized tech-worker fantasy: matcha, AGI talk, a Labubu delivery, thousands of Devin instances, a self-driving Waymo ride, venture capital, and ChatGPT remembering the user's name. The joke mocks startup culture and the promise that AI will make work and life effortless, while exaggerating every trend into a ridiculous status fantasy.

• @gentoomemes / 18682 2025-09-20