Autistic Hacker Saves the West

shut up mom ssh is 500 ms slower than normal. MUST INVESTIGATE the west must be saved son, are you still benchmarking postgresql? You can't just keep doing that all day. millions of computers must be safe imagine being the chink glowies who spent years working on a sophisticated social engineering plan to take over one of the most important and widely used open source projects in the world to execute potentially one of the worst cyberattacks in history, just to be stopped by some autistic dude who sperged out about ssh taking 0.7 seconds instead of 0.2 seconds. I'd like to give my heartfelt thanks to all the autists of the world. We would be living in darker times without you. I still can't believe someone could be this much of a sperg. god bless his autistic heart.

A crudely drawn computer enthusiast intensely investigates SSH being 500 milliseconds slower than usual while his mother and family question his obsession with benchmarking PostgreSQL. The accompanying text sarcastically praises autistic hackers for stopping a devastating cyberattack after noticing a tiny performance difference, making the image a reaction to obsessive technical attention to detail and unexpected heroism.

• @gentoomemes / 11418 2024-05-22
• @eternalclassic / 74827 2025-08-27