Hardware Attestation Wojak Chain

I am running unrooted, unmodified Windows on bare metal, dev mode off, and only apps from the Store Good... Here's your content. I am running unrooted Android with Google Play Services, signed by Google, on real HW and no sideloaded apps I am running non-jailbroken iOS, on real HW I use... something else Pluton Security Processor Microsoft firmware arm TRUSTZONE

A sequence of increasingly locked-down Wojak characters presents Windows, Android, and iOS devices as trusted hardware platforms, while a sad final character says he uses something else. The joke criticizes hardware-backed security and remote attestation by portraying mainstream platforms as compliant and surveilled, while an alternative-software user is isolated and treated as suspicious. It is used as a reaction to discussions about TPM, Pluton, TrustZone, DRM, and software freedom.

• @gentoomemes / 2951 2023-03-11