The Shower Spider Incident

write a 4chan greentext >be me >smell like shit constantly >people are always giving me funny looks >one day >i decide to take a shower >get in the shower >start washing my body >notice a weird lump on my ass >it's moving i freaked the fuck out >get out of the shower >towel dry my body off >inspect the lump >it's a fucking spider >i killed it >took a shower >smelled great the rest of the day

A 4chan-style greentext tells the story of someone who constantly smelled bad, then discovers a moving lump on their body during a shower. The lump turns out to be a spider, and after killing it and showering, they smell great for the rest of the day. The joke is the absurd realization that the spider was apparently responsible for the bad smell, making this useful as a reaction to bizarre or unexpectedly disgusting situations.

• @eternalclassic / 15036 2022-06-15