Speedrunning High School

SPEEDRUNNING HIGH SCHOOL Bus: 4.9 Outside: 4.0 Hallway: 2.6 Dr. Lukes: 17.0 Math: 23.3 Promposal: 8.5 Principal's: 18.0 NICE. I DON'T THINK WE MEET. THAT WORKS.

A fast-paced comedy sketch follows Tommy rushing through a school day like a video-game speedrun: arriving by bus, navigating outside and hallways, checking classes, getting a perfect score, proposing to someone, and finally introducing himself to the principal. The joke is the absurd category timer overlay, which treats ordinary school interactions as optimized speedrun segments, while the dry dialogue and door sounds make Tommy’s frantic progress feel like a game. It works as a reaction to someone completing an exhausting sequence with ridiculous efficiency. EN: A fast-paced comedy sketch follows Tommy rushing through a school day like a video-game speedrun: arriving by bus, navigating outside and hallways, checking classes, getting a perfect score, proposing to someone, and finally introducing himself to the principal. The joke is the absurd category timer overlay, which treats ordinary school interactions as optimized speedrun segments, while the dry dialogue and door sounds make Tommy’s frantic progress feel like a game. It works as a reaction to someone completing an exhausting sequence with ridiculous efficiency.

Have a good day. What's up, Tommy? Oh my God! Tommy, what are you doing here? I'd like to check with classes I have for this semester. I'll pull those out. What was that? I need to investigate. Nice. A perfect score. I can't teach you anything. Get out of here. Not again. Tommy, you want to go prom with me? Sorry, Lydia, that's an optional side quest. And I don't have time. You dropped something. By the way, I don't think we met. I'm Tommy Armstrong. Principal Mack. Here, this is yours. It's not how that works.

• @antichirst / 21918 2026-03-06