Parents Reveal the Real Lies

Lies my parents told me when I was little: 1) Santa is real 2) The tooth fairy leaves money under your pillow 3) The United States military is fighting wars to defend our country 1. I’m Santa, you never complained when you got the gifts. 2. Yes we were such assholes sneaking you money under your pillow. 3. Never once did your mother or I tell you the military is fighting wars to defend our country, that’s a boldface lie on your part.

A screenshot of a social media exchange where someone lists childhood lies their parents supposedly told them, including Santa, the tooth fairy, and the purpose of the U.S. military. The parent replies by confirming the first two jokes but angrily denies ever making the third claim, creating an absurd political punchline about national myths and military intervention.

• @afrosidemoon / 45283 2021-12-23