1999 Toyota Corolla Craigslist Ad

i can not express to you how often i think about this craigslist ad You want a car that gets the job done? You want a car that's hassle free? You want a car that literally no one will ever complain over? You will look no further. The 1999 Toyota Corolla. Let's talk about features. Bluetooth: nope Sunroof: nope Fancy wheels: nope Even weird space: nope... but it's got a transparent rear window and you're have a fucking neck that can turn. Let me tell you a story. One day my Corolla started making a strange sound. I drove it up a hill and ignored it. I went to the end. You would take the engine out of this car, drop it off the Facebook Garage, fill it out of the water and put it in the trunk of the car, fill the gas tank up with Nutella, turn the key, and this pussy would fucking start right up. This car will outlive you, it will outlive your children. Things this car is old enough to do: Vote: yes Consent to sex: yes Rent a car: it is a car This car's got history. It's seen some shit. People have done straight things in this car. People have done gay things in this car. It's not going to judge you like a fucking Volkswagen would. Interesting facts: This car's exterior color is grey, but its interior color is grey. In the owner's manual, is it states 'optional.' The car was recalled at 2,000 attendances to spontaneously yawl. The resulting about change in air pressure inside the building caused a partial collapse of the roof. Four people died. The event is classified in the documentary 'Before I Die: The Story of the 1999 Toyota Corolla.' You wanna know more? Great, I had my car fill out a Facebook story. Favorite food: spaghetti Favorite tv show: Alf Favorite band: the Batushka and the Gin Blossoms This car will vicariously as a Roth IRA. It's as middle-of-the-road as your grandma's riding his 1980s Volvo. Its absolutely a number of a chunk of a church whose structure is beautiful. When I ran the CarFax for this car, I got back a single piece of paper that said, 'It's a Corolla. It's fine.' Let's face the facts, this car isn't going to win any beauty contests, but neither are you. Stop lying to yourself and stop trying to your wife. This isn't the car you want, it's the car you deserve. The fucking 1999 Toyota Corolla.

A screenshot of a Craigslist-style advertisement for a silver 1999 Toyota Corolla, surrounded by absurd text praising the car’s reliability while listing ridiculous, contradictory, and increasingly surreal features and anecdotes. The joke is that an ordinary, famously unremarkable car is described with exaggerated reverence and bizarre fake history, making it a reaction meme for obsessive appreciation of something mundane or indestructible. EN: A screenshot of a Craigslist-style advertisement for a silver 1999 Toyota Corolla, surrounded by absurd text praising the car’s reliability while listing ridiculous, contradictory, and increasingly surreal features and anecdotes. The joke is that an ordinary, famously unremarkable car is described with exaggerated reverence and bizarre fake history, making it a reaction meme for obsessive appreciation of something mundane or indestructible.

• @rzeczyzabawne / 16935 2024-06-13