Trans Man Under the Blanket

I remember using the app Refuge Restroom for the first 3 years because I couldn't pass and was terrified to use the bathroom. The other day I asked a dude in the next stall to hand me some toilet paper and ... Nothing had happened. I got some TP. Passing provides ease, but it's dampened my fire. I hate that everyone is presumed cis. I'm invisible to cis-het eyes, and I count myself lucky that queer people often still *see* me. My driver's license is updated. My social security card, my passport, and birth certificate. I guess I'm "done" transitioning now. Honestly when I started I never thought I would pass, and now I don't know what to do with it. My dysphoria is much better now, but the depression is *not*. (My ass is iconic, my depression is chronic. Etc etc.) Are there other trans people out there who feel like this? I'm like... Forced to assimilate part time in order to survive. My transness is like a dirty secret at work. Stealth life sucks. What am I supposed to do, wear a "he/him" badge at work so I have to start watching my back again every time I use the men's room? Fuck, man. Living in a transphobic world sucks.

A screenshot of a trans man’s long social-media post appears beside a selfie of him lying in bed under a blanket with a stuffed animal. He describes passing as male, completing his legal transition, and feeling safer in public while also feeling invisible and pressured to hide his trans identity at work. The joke is the understated punchline about casually asking for toilet paper in the next stall, while the broader post expresses the complicated emotional cost of stealth and assimilation in a transphobic society.

• @eternalclassic / 86774 2026-04-20