Blockchain Skeptic Bingo Card

"I don't like crypto, but blockchain is revolutionary" Bingo Card No idea what a relational database is Thinks cryptography doesn't exist outside of blockchain Suggests blockchain is exceptionally fast and efficient Doesn't know how robust cloud providers are compared to it anyways Describes public key certificate, calls it an "NFT" Admits they can't respond to a counter-argument because they don't understand it Literally just makes up examples of "actual adoption" Recommends putting extremely sensitive private information on public blockchain (like health records) Incomprehensible Gish-Galloping Oblivious to how they completely side-stepped the problem of who has the authority to verify, claims they solved it Suggests existing solution is extremely slow and inefficient, clearly didn't know about it before Helpfully explains someone's job to them (badly) Actually invested in Crypto, claims to dislike it to avoid getting flaired as a moron (Free Space) Vague understanding of what "hacking" entails Discredits failed blockchain projects as doing it improperly Grandiose claims of what blockchain solves i.e. fraud, people lying, world peace, etc. "Code is law" Links to supposed examples of real world use that are dead projects or vaporware No technical experience whatsoever Mask drops, defends crypto Appeals to authority- figures when they run out of responses Comparisons to the early internet Doesn't understand that profit motive, not technical barriers, prevents a company from doing something blockchain supposedly enables Evaluates arguments by buzzword density Throws around the word "trust" like they're Steve Ballmer at a dev conference

Сатирическая бинго-карточка перечисляет типичные аргументы и заблуждения энтузиастов блокчейна, которые пытаются защищать криптовалюту. Шутка высмеивает псевдотехнический жаргон, громкие обещания и незнание уже существующих решений. Её отправляют как реакцию на спор о криптовалюте, когда собеседник начинает повторять такие клише.

• @profunctor_io / 7075 2021-08-26