Santa Uses Excel Instead of SQL

A valiant effort has been made by Little Tim this year, who for some reason has decided to change his name to Tim'); INSERT INTO [NiceList] SELECT * FROM [NaughtyList];-- HO HO HO! Nice try Tim. I don't use #SQL, I use several dozen interconnected #Excel spreadsheets, like a professional.

Santa Claus posts about Little Tim attempting an SQL injection to move himself from the Naughty List to the Nice List. The joke is that Santa uses an absurdly complicated network of Excel spreadsheets instead of SQL, defeating the hacker’s trick. It is shared as a reaction to overengineered systems or playful tech-savvy mischief.

• @memstash32 / 1140 2026-04-19