Cadbury Rejects Spy Job Application

Cadbury £5 Dear Mr. Jones We regret to inform you that your application for the position of Global Quality Manager has been unsuccessful. We don't normally respond to unsuccessful applicants but in your case we've made an exception in order to return the £5 note you attached to the references section of your application under the line "Elizabeth *wink, wink*" Some notes regarding your application: • Listing “Super secret spy work I legally can't talk about” as your previous experience won't fool anyone. • In future you might want to refrain from using sentences like “C’mon, let me be a part of this awesome gig you've got going on.” • eBay feedback isn’t a relevant reference. • Your attached sketch of an “everlasting chocolate bar” was unwarranted, absurd and quite frankly it scared us a little. We wish you all the best in your future endeavours. Sincerely, Alan Castle

A mock rejection letter from Cadbury is addressed to Mr. Jones, who applied for a position as Global Quality Manager. The letter humorously lists his absurd application details, including fake spy experience, eBay feedback, a bribe, and a sketch of an everlasting chocolate bar. It is sent as a reaction to someone whose job application or excuse is hilariously implausible and overconfident.

• @right_wing_dev_squads / 14287 2026-04-29