Google Employees in a Bureaucratic Maze

Google has 175,000+ capable and well- compensated employees who get very little done quarter over quarter, year over year. Like mice, they are trapped in a maze of approvals, launch processes, legal reviews, performance reviews, exec reviews, documents, meetings, bug reports, triage, OKRs, H1 plans followed by H2 plans, all-hands summits, and inevitable reorgs. The mice are regularly fed their “cheese” (promotions, bonuses, fancy food, fancier perks) and despite many wanting to experience personal satisfaction and impact from their work, the system trains them to quell these inappropriate desires and learn what it actually means to be “Googley” — just don’t rock the boat.

A text meme presents Google employees as capable mice trapped in a bureaucratic maze of approvals, meetings, reviews, planning cycles, and reorganizations. Their “cheese” consists of promotions, bonuses, food, and perks, while the system discourages meaningful impact or personal satisfaction. It is sent as a sarcastic reaction to corporate bureaucracy, ineffective processes, and big-company stagnation.

• @jemalloc / 1778 2024-10-23