The Dumb Dumb Mister

>Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago >Get startled by phone ringing >It's one of my players >Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?" >Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a favor?" >OhGod HeKilled Someone.gif >Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot." >Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the recordings of your sessions before bed, but I left my laptop at the office so I can't play them." >NaniTheFuck.mp3 >Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?" >Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister'! Guess Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler." >Me: "Wow... well, if it will help her sleep, then sure." >Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker." >Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon." >Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!" >I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg >Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS ENGAGE)...the time your daddy and his friends went deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?" >Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises) >I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and says he'll see me on game night. >Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable for once. I should have thanked him. >I am the dumb dumb mister.

A sleep-deprived Dungeon Master receives a late-night call from a friend whose young daughter cannot sleep. He improvises a fantasy story over the phone, and she affectionately calls him “dumb dumb mister” because “Dungeon Master” is too difficult to say. The joke becomes unexpectedly wholesome as the narrator realizes that helping her made him feel happy and content.

• @eternalclassic / 28864 2023-03-05
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